but it's crazy how this is causing my anxiety to kick in. i get it though; it's just trying to protect me.

i'm thinking of all the past experiences i've had in dating and i'm really trying to my hardest to fight against my instincts. i'm trying to forgive and let go of the past. i'm really trying to not bleed on someone who never stabbed me.

i pray God can give him the same strength. because i think we're both scared and i'm so scared out of my mind. But Isaiah 43 comes to mind:

Remember the former things nor the things of old. Behold I am doing a new thing — do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wildnerness and rivers in the desert.

I choose to have faith. Even though I feel my anxiety drowning me. God will sustain me.