No matter how much you think your man is doing, there's more that he can afford.
Every man is capable of putting in more than they are currently giving to their relationships.
A man can give everything even unto death, but he won't do it until he has a justifiable reason to do so.
Why will more than 90% of the men give less than they can afford?
This article aims to give five (5) reasons why men don't give 100% in their relationship with women.
Here we go;
#1. Fear of being disappointed:
While growing up I watched my childhood friend mercilessly in love with a pretty girl.
He gave the best he could as per time, gift items, and many more.
I was curious because I haven't seen people date this way. (Staying this from my historical background)
One day he came to visit, so I initiated a conversation that allowed me to ask him a question concerning my curiosity.
Here is my question
Bro, why are you doing so much for your relationship? You're young and still have a long way to go. There are chances that you will not end up as partners. Aren't you bothered that all your commitments will be wasted?
He answered me
Nothing is guaranteed in life, everything will end someday. When you love someone, give love your best shot. If things go well you have yourself to thank nit if things go sour, you won't blame yourself after all.
This is one reason some men don't go all out for what they have.
#2. A Man fears not to be taken for granted:
I went to visit my dad's friend, randomly we started talking about life in general. Then suddenly the conversation drifted towards marriage and parenting.
I know him to be a very good father and a reputable man in our neighborhood. But I was shocked when I had him say that he has only cooked for his wife three times since they've been married for 28 years.
With great awe, I was waiting for him to explain further.
He added that he never planned it so. He looked forward to being a supportive husband before he got married. Things changed when the wife started verbally requesting him to fix dinner and do the dishes.
I don't know how you interpret this, but I think there's is more to the verbal request.
Most times it's not what is said that get people angry but how it is said.
Some men will do anything to avoid being taken for granted. They remain consistent when they are sure that their reputation is preserved regardless of their commitment, accountability, playfulness, and transparency.
#3. Unparalleled Realities:
It's not wrong to have certain expectations before starting a romantic relationship. It's a sign that you're aware of the peculiarities that are in sync with your personality.
In the midst of this, we should also understand that people advertise their advantages. That is, people act the way they want to be addressed. Not until you become part of their lives, you may never know what's on the other face of the coin.
While it's important to set some realistic expectations, we should expect to embrace some personal weaknesses, irritation, fears, uncertainties, vulnerabilities, and newly evolved adaptive traits.
#4. Indecisiveness:
Sometimes the best decision is simply to make any decision. Emily Grabatin
There are consequences of our decisions and indecisiveness. Men prefer to cope with those of indecisions than to be committed to an unsure relationship.
Anyone can be indecisive when he or she has so much doubt, insecurity, and disrespect.
Anything that beaches his trust is too expensive.
Another reason why a man will be skeptical about a relationship is when he has lost the wheel over the relationship.
Men like to be on top of the game, they love the feeling of being responsible for the relationship. When this slips out of his hand, he isn't sure of further commitment.
#5. Busy! Busy! Busy!
A man communicates love differently from a woman.
To him, love is giving, provision, and protection in addition to others.
A man can have genuinely concerns and love for the family but unavoidably absent when needed at times.
In my few months of practice in internal medicine, I have seen women abandon almost everything about their lives to be supportive of a terminally ill husband. Meanwhile, a man will rather pay to have someone look after his sick family member while he's on the quest to provide all that is needed for the hospital bills.
To him provision is love.
Finally
Men and women must understand their respective gender roles. It will help you relate to some realities and make the necessary adjustments.
Men are more logical than emotional, they can give more when they find the right reasons to.