Everyone has one or a few villains in their lives that form part of their story. I'm sure a few people come to mind the minute you see the word 'villain', and they change from time to time and from season to season.

These people come into our lives and make things difficult either deliberately or unconsciously. You could encounter them anywhere: on the street, at home, on the job, on the internet. In the thick of things, you could wonder: 'What did I do to deserve being treated this way?' or, 'Why is this person being so unkind to me?'

I have met many villains of my own from a very young age. Sometimes they were close relatives. Other times it was a colleague at work or a friend. In retrospect, I realize that there is so much to learn from these people and the situations I went through in those hard seasons.

Here are the three top lessons I have learned from the villains that have come along in my story so far:

It's temporary It may feel like it's the end of the world when you're in the middle of a difficult situation brought about by this person, but it really isn't. Your ability to see past it and envision a time where it's all in the past might be the most important thing to keep you going in the present.

It's hard. I know. I have been there. I see you.

Take a few minutes to imagine being on the other side of this situation. Interestingly, seeing yourself on the other side might give you clues on what you need to start doing right now to change the situation for the better.

Pattern, learn, and pivot Have you seen the script before? Does the situation look familiar? Are there any clues on your path? If so, it's worth sitting down with a pen and paper and writing out how and when this has happened before.

What led to the situation and how did you overcome it in the past? What changes did you make? Experience is indeed a great teacher. It could be painful when it's your own experience, however, to avoid a reoccurrence, document it, learn from it, and change your tactics.

Build from the discomfort There are times when the discomfort caused by the villain is a good thing. I have found that villains appear in my story when it's time to step up my game, change my strategy, or step out of a situation.

To do this, there are skills or steps I need to take that I would not have if I remained comfortable and cozy. The villain adds tension. Tension causes an imbalance and catapults you out of your comfort zone. The lessons that you learn in these moments turn out to be the deepest and most valuable ones. The kind you don't forget in a lifetime.

It's never easy to be in a difficult situation. It's easy to deeply dislike the person and become bitter and resentful towards them. This is not helpful and this only harms you. Don't get bitter, get better.

Change the way you view the situation and see yourself on the other side. Build coping mechanisms while you're going through it, document it, and learn the skills and lessons necessary to move out of it and make sure the situation doesn't repeat itself.

More importantly, know that the situation will not last. Begin today to envision how you will look on the other side of it and start taking action towards that goal today.

Have you encountered any villains? Are you dealing with any right now? How do you work through such situations? What has helped you in the past?