Have you ever tried to glue paper with a hammer? Or nail wood with glue?
The best carpenter couldn't do it — the tools weren't made for those purposes.
Social media was built to be addictive.
So why do we blame ourselves when we fall prey to 3-hour door scrolls?
A Terrain Filled With Traps
Imagine social media as a wide terrain filled with traps.
Every time you log in, you're navigating this terrain blindly, until — oops! You fall into a trap and it takes you hours to get out.
Recognising the traps is the first step to spotting them and avoiding them as much as possible.
Once you acknowledge that social media was designed to be addictive, you stop blaming yourself for not having enough discipline to fight it.
The 7 Traps of Engagement
Social media companies earn money through ads.
To get you to see more ads, they need to keep you on the app.
Here are 7 (out of many) traps social media companies lay to keep you engaged.
P.S.: the combined effect is greater than the sum of its parts.
- Controversy
Negativity bias is our tendency to pay more attention to negativity than positivity.
It's an evolutionary thing — negative things could be potential threats while positive things don't affect our survival much.
So the more people bash each other in the comments section, the more likely the algorithm further distributes the content, and the more people get sucked into the cycle.
2. Confirmation bias
The algorithm shows us what we want to see.
We are biased towards information that fits our current beliefs.
This bias leads to the creation of echo chambers — which polarise the Internet (us) into different groups. (At its extreme, it can lead to self-radicalisation.)
3. Infinite scroll
There's no such thing as 'done for the day' on social media.
There's no satisfaction in finishing because there's no finish line.
When Aza Raskin invented the infinite scroll in 2006, he did not anticipate the consequences.
4. Internet surveillance
Social media companies silently collect data every time you use their apps.
Yes, that data may be anonymous — but aggregate data is all they need to create a psychological profile of their users.
They can then use that profile to target ads and content that are more likely to hook you — keeping you on the app longer.
5. Killing boredom (it's not a good thing)
When was the last time you sat in silence with your thoughts?
Social media made sure we'd never feel bored again.
By extension, social media has killed mind-wandering too.
Mind-wandering is associated with creativity and insight as our brains are free to make connections between information.
But we don't give it the chance to do that anymore.
6. Validate me
Social media gives us instant validation through likes, comments, views, and follows.
It tempts us with virality and fame — or even just the validation from our social circles.
Worst of all, it disguises it as a 'connection'. (Any relationship that exists only on social media is superficial by nature.)
7. Real-time notifications (for 24/7 engagement)
Every time you hear the 'ping' of the notification that GuyFromHighSchoolYouHaven'tSpokenToInYears02 liked your post, you get a hit of dopamine.
You open the app to check on your post and try to think about how other people would interpret your post.
Social media companies make sure they never fall off your radar.
Reality Design
When we use social media, we're not just losing a few hours each day — we're fundamentally changing our perception of reality.
Social media is reality design — via a lens of negativity bias, false normalisation, and cheap dopamine (but packaged as education, connectivity, and free entertainment).
They exploit our dopamine system not to help us survive or thrive, but to increase our engagement.
We have become our own products.
What We Can Do
If the problem lies in how the system was built, what can we as individuals do to change our lives?
If we want to solve the root of the problem, we need systemic change — instead of traps, build signboards that help us along on our journey.
Remove the infinite scroll. Stop Internet surveillance. Explore alternative business models that don't rely on ads, and thus user engagement, for profit. (X switching to a subscription model is an interesting case study.)
This doesn't mean social media has to be banished. They just have to be rebuilt with different goals in mind.
Meanwhile, there are 7 small changes individuals can make to minimise the negative impacts of social media on our lives.
- Schedule your usage
Let's say you can only use social media from 9:15 p.m. — 9:30 p.m.
It'll be hard to stick to it at first. You'll feel like checking the app throughout your day — try to keep track of when this happens & spot patterns.
Pro tip: log out of your account so it increases the effort for you to log back in.
2. Delete the main culprits
Sometimes scheduling your usage doesn't work.
In such cases, rip the bandaid off and delete the app.
I recommend doing a digital detox every once in a while. It does wonders to reset your life.
3. Be a curator
Here's a challenge: only follow up to 100 accounts. (I've cut down to 120.)
This will force you to filter out accounts that don't serve you and are just wasting your time.
It also means you'll see fewer posts on your feed (as long as you don't fall into the explore page spiral).
4. Replace scrolling with 5 pushups
I say 5 pushups, but it can be anything that interrupts the urge to scroll — jumping jacks, air punches, or simply walking into another room and leaving your phone behind.
Metaphorically, this is where you notice the trap and are trying to walk around it.
5. Mindfulness
One of my favourite activities to do that has positive impacts on long-term well-being.
Mindfulness will help you spot traps faster — you'll be able to catch yourself when you're starting to fall into mindless scrolling.
You'll apply what you practice during meditation to social media usage (observe without judgement and recenter your focus).
6. Find your (in real life) tribe
Thousands of people are trying to have healthier relationships with social media, just like you.
Find them in real life and have conversations about your obstacles and progress.
Replace your online tribe with your offline tribe.
7. Journal
Does your current relationship with social media fit into your vision for your life?
Journaling is one of the best ways to be metacognitive.
When we scroll mindlessly on social media, we're engaging our limbic system — the emotional, reactive part of our brain that releases dopamine when we watch cute cat reels.
When we journal, we're engaging our prefrontal cortex — the rational part of our brain that regulates the limbic system. It says, "That's enough cat videos for today, let's focus on other things."
Conclusion
Most people use social media for connectivity, entertainment, and inspiration (it's how the apps brand themselves).
But be aware of the whole package — it comes with mindless scrolling and skewed reality design.
The way information gets to you, McLuhan argued, is more important than the information itself. — Johann Hari, Stolen Focus
Social media is a superficial medium that loves speed and controversy. Any education or information you get from it naturally lacks depth.
If you'd like to learn more about the impacts of social media on our world and how we can improve it, I recommend reading Stolen Focus by Johann Hari (which I've read) and Outrage Machine by Tobias Rose-Stockwell (which I'm planning to read).
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