Growing as an Engineer: Lessons Learned (the Hard Way)

Hey, I'm Gabe —Welcome to the Journey!

Hey, I'm Gabe! If we haven't met yet, it's great to meet you. I've been working in software for over 25 years, and in that time, I've worn just about every hat — from developer to manager, from running my own business to teaching. Along the way, I've made plenty of mistakes, learned from them, and kept going. This is the first in a series of blog posts all about growing your engineering career, and I'm here to share what I've learned over the years to help you along your journey.

Listen, it's not like I've got it all figured out. I've struggled a lot through my career, made plenty of mistakes, and I still do. This isn't a destination — it's a journey. As long as I'm working, I'll be making mistakes and learning from them. My goal with this series is to share some of the lessons I've learned along the way from practical experience, sprinkled with wisdom from great books I've read over the years.

I tried being a manager but found it wasn't for me — a theme I'll revisit throughout this series, as many wrestle with the same decision.

I've also spent a significant part of my career feeling lost, trying to navigate misconceptions about what it means to be a manager versus an individual contributor. There were times when I stumbled, faced setbacks, and had to recover and keep moving forward. Every misstep taught me something valuable, but I often wished I had a guide to help me through those confusing times.

If you've ever felt that way too, you're not alone.

The Lessons I Wish I'd Had

I'm focusing on the staff and manager levels because they're pivotal points in an engineer's career. But here's the thing: the lessons I've picked up are valuable at any stage, whether you're just starting out or already well-established. My goal is to help you build the skills and experiences that will allow you to be more intentional in shaping your career — something I wish I'd been. There's no substitute for living through these moments, but as you reflect on the knowledge I share, my hope is that it'll guide you on your path. Whether you're on the IC track, eyeing management, or simply curious about how to work better with your manager or staff engineers, I believe there's something here for everyone.

Over the years, I've had the privilege of mentoring others — guiding them from their early career days to taking on roles like staff engineer and beyond. I've helped them navigate these pivotal transitions, and I love those conversations. But then I thought, "Why not create something that can serve as a reference for even more people?" This series is my way of giving back by sharing lessons learned from my own journey, as well as insights from great resources like The Staff Engineer's Path by Tanya Reilly and The Manager's Path by Camille Fournier. You'll see these influences woven throughout as I cover key career challenges and opportunities.

What You'll Learn

If I'd had access to the lessons I'm sharing here when I first stepped into management — or even before that — I would have made some different decisions. Like many engineers, I thought management was the only way to grow my career, and it took a lot of trial and error to realize that wasn't true. The reality of management was more complex than I expected, and I quickly learned that it wasn't the path I wanted for myself. By sharing these experiences and insights, my hope is to help you avoid some of the same mistakes and give you a clearer view of the choices ahead. Whether you're just starting out or already established, understanding what's possible in your career and being intentional about your growth can make a huge difference.

Reflecting on my own experiences, I realized how much I would have benefited from the lessons I'm sharing here. This series is designed to offer the guidance I wish I'd had earlier in my career. So, what's in it for you?

By following this series, you'll gain:

A Clear Roadmap for Your Career: Whether you're new to the field or a seasoned pro, we'll explore what's next and how to navigate each stage. I'll break it down so you can map your journey with more clarity and confidence.
The Realization That Management Isn't the Only Path: Like I once thought, you might feel that management is the only way to advance. But I've since learned that technical leadership can be just as fulfilling. We'll dive into both paths, so you can decide which one suits you best.
How to Navigate the Staff Engineer Role: If you've recently stepped into this role and feel a little lost, you're not alone. I've been there too, and I'll share what I've learned about thriving as a staff engineer and growing in that position.
Strategies to Maximize Your Impact: Let's make every keystroke count. I've always been inspired by Scott Hanselman's idea that we all have a limited number of keystrokes in our lives, so we should use them wisely. By sharing the lessons I've learned, my goal is to help you direct your efforts toward things that truly matter — both in your career and your personal growth.

Why This Series Will Change the Way You Think About Your Career

When I first became a staff engineer, I wasn't sure what the role really entailed. Looking back, if I'd known what I know now, I could have navigated that transition more smoothly. My mix of experiences helped me along the way, but I wasn't as intentional as I could have been. This series is designed to give you the insights I wish I'd had back then, so whether you're already in a leadership role or thinking about it, you'll gain a clearer understanding of how to handle the challenges of both management and technical leadership.

Wherever you are in your career, the next step can feel overwhelming. Maybe you're wondering if you should move into management, or maybe you're trying to figure out how to make a bigger impact as a staff engineer. These transitions are tough, and you don't have to go through them alone. This series is designed to help you through those transitions and give you the tools to succeed.

What's Coming Next

I want this series to be fun, valuable, and collaborative. Like in software development, I plan to keep things iterative — your feedback will help shape future posts, and we might even pivot based on what you find most useful.

I also plan to bring in voices from people I know who've had different career journeys and growth experiences. I'm thinking of interviewing them and posting those conversations on YouTube to add more perspectives.

For now, here's a sneak peek of what's coming next (unless your feedback leads us somewhere else):

Management Myths and Realities Is management really the right path, or is it just something people think they should do? We'll debunk common myths and explore what being a manager actually involves, using insights from The Manager's Path.
The Staff Engineer Transition So you've become a staff engineer — now what? We'll dig into how this role differs from being a senior engineer and how to maximize your effectiveness, with help from The Staff Engineer's Path.
Leading Without Authority How do you lead when you're not the boss? This post will explore how staff engineers and technical leaders can influence teams and drive impact without formal authority.
Communication Is Key Whether you're new to the role or experienced, communication is vital. We'll talk about how to present ideas, give feedback, and bring people together, regardless of your position.

Let's Do This!

No matter where you are in your career, this series is here to help you grow, explore new roles, and figure out what comes next. From those just starting out to seasoned engineers, I've got insights and lessons (with maybe a few light-hearted anecdotes) to share — all aimed at making your journey clearer and more enjoyable.

Ready to take the next step? Let's dive into this journey together, learning from both my mistakes and the lessons I've gained over the years.

P.S. Got questions or thoughts? I'd love to hear them! Drop a comment or reach out to me via LinkedIn — let's keep the conversation going and help each other out.