I've been there too. But what if fulfillment isn't about accumulating more, but appreciating what we already have?
Society obsessively teaches us more is better — more money, status, achievements equal happiness and self-worth. I've bought into it too and still do to a certain degree.
But lately I'm questioning if this mindset actually fulfills us.
Much suffering comes from comparing myself to ideals or others. But if I paused to truly see that we all share basic struggles, empathy would replace judgment. Under the surface, we're all "flawed" and vulnerable, at least we would be out of the perspective of our current society.
This is challenging inner work — welcoming reality just as it is, imperfect yet beautiful.
We're conditioned to always want more. If you just work harder! Make more money! Buy a bigger house! Apparently the magic formula is just around the corner…
What if Society Got It All Wrong?
Turns out, chasing happiness too directly may be counterproductive:
The 10 Commandments of Chasing Happiness That Actually Backfire:
- Coveting thy neighbor's new car, job, partner
- Continuously seeking big breakthroughs rather than appreciating small joys
- Judging experiences as failures unless they're Instagrammably perfect
- Equating net worth with self-worth
- Never feeling you have enough trophies, toys, titles to show off
- Getting stuck in analysis paralysis seeking the theoretically optimal choices (i am currently stuck here)
- Mindlessly indulging every desire without ever saying no
- Relentlessly focusing on the future rather than enjoying today
- Replaying positive memories on repeat trying to re-experience the high
- Believing lasting happiness will come from just one more success
Here was my lightbulb moment — happiness can't be seized, only savored when life hands you the ingredients.
The counterintuitive secret?
Stop chasing and start appreciating all you already have right now.
I know — easier said than done with our insatiable monkey minds. But small steps through practicing gratitude can reshape our awareness:
5-Minute Daily Gratitude Practice That Reprograms Your Mindset
- Write down 3 genuine things you appreciate about your life or world. Get specific — don't just say "my health." Say "jogging through crisp fall air."
- Share out loud with someone 1 meaningful memory which brings warmth just by revisiting.
- Mindfully enjoy 1 sensory pleasure you often overlook — the aroma of coffee, cat purrs, shower's hot spray.
- Send a short gratitude text to someone who did something that improved your day, however small.
- Take 10 conscious belly breaths while silently thanking existence for this improbable gift called life.
Through focusing on the blessings we already have rather than obsessing over what we lack, our mindset can shift. I realized abundance hides in plain sight all around us and within us, without actually owning much.
And lets be honest, we go into this life without possession, and we leave without physical possessions. So focus on what is always right here instead of fleeting things.
We sweat the small stuff while forgetting the big picture — we're privileged to simply breathe, laugh, love. Feel the sun's warmth, share passions with others.
Suddenly my imperfect yet beautiful life sparked up with hidden riches money can't buy. The squirrel scampering up a tree when i went on a walk in the forest nearby captivated me more than any TV show.
So next time you crave that temporary pleasure or trophy, pause. Turn attention inward to the only lasting oasis — your own heart's wisdom. Stop seeking, start appreciating.
Happiness waits patiently not in the next accomplishment but the stillness between thoughts. Let gratitude gently redirect your compass to all you already are and have.
The choice is yours — keep chasing shadows on the horizon or embrace the light within arm's reach. Your move.
Check this out, you won't regret it!:
⚠ Hey there, unfortunately, I can only keep focusing time on writing if I have more financial security. ⚠
🛑 If you like what I create, please consider supporting me either on Substack or by buy me a coffee☕ (you don't need an account). Your help allows me to continue publishing regularly. Thank you! :) 🛑