Living Your Life Purposefully — Episode #2

The Vacancy

After Uncle El vacated the room beneath the stairs, it remained open for a short time before another occupant moved there.

Occupant #2

The nephew

My grandmother came from a huge family, there were thirteen children!

Picture 15 persons living in a home … that's a lot of people.

Her eldest sister had given birth to five children. The youngest boy named Ash had Down's Syndrome.

My great aunt later emigrated to the USA with three of her children, leaving the teenage Ashley behind.

I was never privy to the reasons why Ashley was never able to go live with her in the US. Or why she did not return to care for him after her sister died.

All my childhood memories of Ash were of him living with our aunt. Whenever we visited, he was always there.

As children, we knew he was a little different, but we did not grasp the fullness of his challenges, and no one treated him differently.

Now that our aunt was dead the dilemma became, where would he live.

His mother was elderly by this time, she had never returned to live in Guyana and visited twice a year for about two to four months at a time.

She would take Ash to her home in another city, but sooner or later, she would return him to his aunt because she did not know how to manage him.

He was not docile; he had developed a mind of his own along the way.

None of the older cousins that he grew up with wanted the responsibility, so of course, Ash became — occupant #2

Kindness

In my village, I knew of two persons with Down's Syndrome. Ash was one and the other was a female who lived at the corner of the main road.

One great memory I have from childhood is the way the people in my village cared for those who were challenged in one way or another.

They were never treated with a difference. Both lived long lives. Ash lived into his late 50's and D, the female is still alive.

In search of a caretaker

Now that my great aunt was dead, who to care for Ash?

His mother lived in America and visited once a year.

None of the other family members were prepared to take on the responsibility for Ash.

The decision needed to be made speedily, our aunt was gone and his mother, though beyond retired age and unemployed, needed to return to the US.

Our other aunt lived quite a way off and her husband was not in agreement to house the new tenant.

The decision fell, of course, to my grandmother. She had the extra room.

And just that simple, Ash became an occupant of the room beneath the stairs.

Once again, grandma stepped up to the plate.

Ash remained a happy occupant of the room until he died several years later.

He lived to be almost 60 years old, which is rare for persons with Down's Syndrome.

RIP Ash, we love you!

The vacancy will be filled once more…

Pene Hodge is a mom, a nurse, and a writer. She writes because she must. She loves people and is committed to sharing and gleaning knowledge for the betterment of all.