I just came from acupuncture. Chinese acupuncture, they call this specific kind. It's subsidized through my healthcare, up to 20 alternative medicine treatments a year. Yay for Israeli health insurance. I don't know why I didn't take advantage of this before, but this past few months I've been in lots of pain, so I decided it was time to try. I've had back pain most of my life, and broke my hand a couple times, and was in pain around my daughters' births and after. Irresponsible positioning during breastfeeding early days had a long-term effect. Or hours at computers for ages in creative or productive sedentary jobs. Or who knows what.

But then I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and that all changed. I powered through it while working full time and carrying on with my life. But afterwards, my body rebelled. It could be because duh I was exhausted, or it could be because of all the treatment and their effects. One would venture a guess that both. Both? Both. So I decided to do whatever I could now to help alleviate the pain, symptoms, and hopefully simultaneously figure out why who what where. Treat and retreat. I made that up, that's not a thing.

See, my friendly type of cancer (jokes aside, there are many worse kinds, TBH, but the word friendly is nonetheless used sardonically here) is estrogen-positive. Which means it responds to estrogen and is thus treatable more easily by repressing, but that means all kinds of meds even after the chemo and surgery and radiation and all that fun package. It means hormones (oral and monthly injections) for years after, which also means that I'm essentially menopausal at a way too early age. Fun? Nope, not even a little. When I say I want to soak the bed at night, I don't mean with night sweats. But such is life.

If it wasn't yet obvious, there's pretty much nothing I won't joke about, and dark humor is a favorite, and also one of my ways of coping. And having an actual positive attitude along the way and pushing for regular life was part of helped me get through all of it, with plenty of laughter along the way. That being said, sometimes people are pretty dense.

It's rainy and icky in Israel these days, because winter. Not Detroit cold, not even close. But relative to normal winters pre global warming, or just generally, it's rainy and cold and wet and not ideal. People bundle up as if it's Siberia. As someone who spent my college years in the Northeast and lived in NY for four years, I'm not as easily impressed by the cold, and I also know how to handle it with either layering, or just throwing on a heavy coat for the outside moments. On top of all that, I do get hot flashes, because of said hormone therapy. So that makes life a bit unpredictable. And sometimes hot, and sometimes balmy or sweaty.

I walked into the clinic, and the heat was blasting. I immediately took off my jacket, and was sitting there in a sleeveless dress. The secretary looked at me, stunned, and said "Are you hot?" and I proudly restrained myself from saying "Can't you tell? I'm smokin, lady!" (I wasn't really tempted to say that). I nodded. She said, "wow, lucky you!" I'm like "welllll, nope." She goes, "Yeah, totally, fun for you." I shook my head, not adding anything. But she kept it up "Maybe not in summer, but in the winter? That's great. How lucky." And I said "No, it's not, really," and I was going to leave it at that.

But then I thought about where I was, and about other people who may come for all kinds of reasons, and I decided I wasn't going to just let it slide.

I said to her "Listen, as someone who works in an alternative medicine center connected directly with healthcare, I'd think you realize that people come here for all kinds of reasons. And if I get hot when it's not" at which point she goes "but you're young!" (as in, you can't be talking about hot flashes because you're a woman or whatever. Which yes thanks is true and also anytime someone calls me young, I'll take it, BUT…) I said, "Yeah, but I had breast cancer, and part of the magic of those drugs is that they have all kinds of side effects. I would hope that you would think to be a bit more sensitive to those kinds of things here and from now on, because you don't know what people are walking in with."

And that left her speechless.

And I felt kind of bad. But also kind of not. Because maybe the next person won't be made to feel uncomfortable.

And the acupuncturist came to call me just in time…

So tell me, was I somewhat harsh? Should I have let the moment slide? Should I have clarified earlier on? Should I have just stayed silent?

What would you have done?