Is it just me or does the word 'rumination' sound like a good thing? Like a high-end candle or an age-defying celebrity spa treatment.

Ruminating also feels good, at least at first. Your anxious mind gets to rip into a problem. You argue with passion and persuasion, never short of a snappy comeback, leaving your adversary nothing to do but declare you righteous— even if the argument exists only inside your own head.

Ruminating is a pretty term for a practice that research shows has a connection to depression, anxiety and binge drinking.

Problem solving is like a ski slope. You're up. You're down. But you eventually come out on the other side. Rumination, on the other hand, is like a roller skating rink. You get trapped inside of an endless loop.

Never confuse rumination with problem solving.

Ruminating is the act of obsessing about a problem, life event or idea. Not to be confused with problem solving, rumination is a vicious cycle where you overthink, overanalyze and send your sense of wellbeing over the edge of the nearest cliff.

When we ruminate, we often convince ourselves that we are just trying to solve the problem. The more scheming amongst us will justify our rumination as a way to process our feelings.

Want to know the difference between ruminating and problem solving?

You know you're ruminating when you have no new ideas. Your thought process offers you no new solutions. You've found little or no new information to consider.

Those epic in-your-head-only arguments with those who have hurt you, offended you, or overlooked you are getting stale. Remember, you said that line already.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but problem solving actually leads to a problem being solved. Ruminating never arrives at its destination. Never.

Ruminating transports you from the present, where you can actually do something, into a future that has not, and may not, ever happen.

What you gain when you give up ruminating.

Left unchecked, your brilliant, powerful mind will do more damage than whatever you were originally concerned about. Don't let it.

When you learn to recognize and stop rumination, you:

• Can identify the real problem and see your options more clearly
• Get to focus on the things that you can change
• Stop wasting time and energy on things you can't change (if it's legitimately something you can't change, no amount of mental gymnastics is going to change that)
• Force yourself to do something, hopefully productive, with your anxious feelings (now that you can't just gnaw on them all day long)
• View painful or stressful events from a place of agency, rather than defeat
• Release yourself to enjoy the good things in your life

You are greater than your worries. Address issues, but don't allow any problem a longer shelf life than it deserves.

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