It is one of the most important life lessons, and here are my 5 unexpected recommendations from 35 years of developing companies and coaching leaders.
January 1, 2024.
I bet most readers had a fun night; many fought a hangover today.
New Year's Eve is one of the big Party Nights. One of my LinkedIn contacts wrote:
" I hope you all are enjoying something expensive and bubbly. 🍾 🥂 🎉 See you in 2024!"
Partying, champaign, enjoying Life with friends — this is how I remember New Year's Eve since I can recall. It was never a dull evening.
It is also the evening with one of the most common recurring questions on this specific evening:
"What is your New Year's Resolution?"
Since we are social animals and want to connect with other people, everybody has an answer prepared:
"I want to stop smoking"
"I want to become rich"
"I want to do this one education I always wanted to do."
"I want to go on my dream holiday."
These are the most common answers I remember from celebrating 49 New Year's Eves in my Life.
But the statistics are shattering:
90% of New Year's Resolutions fail. 23% quit at the end of the first week and 43% quit by End of January.
Here are 5 of my favorite ideas to get you into the 10% bucket. Those who set a goal and finally achieve it:
Mean it
One reason New Year's Resolutions fail is that people say it to answer a question but don't mean it.
Sure, in the heat of the New Year's Eve Moment, they are sincere and mean it in this very second they say it, but at the same time, they haven't given it any thorough thought process.
Sometimes, questions also come in a suggestive form:
"What is your resolution? Quitting smoking?"
"Yeah. Damn right. 2024 is the year when I stop this nasty habit."
They laugh, say cheers, drink more bubbly, and have a fun evening.
Who wants to break the positive energy and vibes and be anti-social during this important night of the year with comments like:
"I don't do New Year's Resolutions."
"Sorry. No comment."
"Ask someone else. I don't like this question."
It is fine to say something to make others feel good as a contribution to a fun night, and it is not surprising that those resolutions don't last longer than a week.
Most likely, they are forgotten and buried during the morning hangover. At best, the person looks at the pack of cigarettes on the desk after waking up, thinks they should stop smoking, and then the hangover sets in.
They sit up, pull a ciggy from the packet, light it up, take a long, satisfying drag, and think to themselves: "Life is good."
And go on with their business.
Rule #1 to improve your "Goal-Setting Skills"
Please give it some thought and mean it. I like having my 5 to 7 key areas of Life clearly described, and I used December to think about the 12-month goals for the coming year. Every evening, I sit down and ponder what it is I want to achieve. When the New Year's questions come, I have an answer that resonates.
Paint it in bright colors.
Giving the thought process enough time ensures it consciously occupies your mind even after New Year's Eve.
Achieving something in Life must be in your conscious mind as a longer "train of thoughts."
Pondering for 15 minutes every evening about your immediate future makes this wonder happen. The mental motion carries over to the next year.
Since we all have a potential maximum of 1,020 months on this planet, make the next 12 months count. Use your lifetime wisely and have it clear to you what you want to achieve.
Once you get clarity on the goal, make it attractive and specific.
Just saying yes to not smoking or running a marathon is not enough to create the necessary pull you need to keep going in 2024.
When I decided that running a marathon was the right goal, I had no clue how it would feel once I accomplished the mission.
A clear picture of what positive vibes and changes achieving a goal creates in your Life is important for setting attractive goals.
It is the same in business.
Just saying I want to be the business with 1 million revenues next year is not enough. How will it feel when you are there? What can you do with the money?
When you don't have answers, talk with people who already accomplished the goal you want to pursue in 2024.
The first thing I did when I wanted to run a marathon was buy 5 books about one thing:
"Running marathons."
I knew nobody in my close vicinity who finished a 42.195 km run.
Amazon.com helped me find inspiring books about running long distances for average business guys like me.
After a search, I found many books on the subject of long-distance running that I still love reading today, like Born to Run, Dean Karnazes Books, Haruki Murakami's Book on Running, Biographies of Ultra Runners, and one book on the "How to Run Your First Marathon."
Immersing myself in the emotions and insights of people who accomplished Marathon Goals multiple times was extremely inspiring.
Rule #2: Know the result and expose yourself to stories of people who have accomplished your goal already. It helps gain clarity on what the outcome will be to decide whether it is worth going for it or not.
Start Small. Be Realistic.
Reading books about transcendence and deep philosophical insights gained during endurance events motivated me enough to start.
The pull towards the goal was so strong that I wanted to run the first Marathon immediately. Tomorrow.
After lacing up my shoes, I felt great and started running at a fast pace, driven by the willpower not to stop before I completed 42.2 kilometers.
The experiment lasted not more than 300 meters. I was done.
Running a Marathon is nothing anybody can think into existence.
It needs doing.
Proper practice.
Proper training.
Time to adept.
This is the chokepoint for many people.
The realization between the great vision of Life and today is a huge divide. A huge wide chasm, where you first need to descend into the abyss, walk a long time in the dark, alone, before you can ascend on the other end, see sunlight again, and finally cross the transcendental finish line.
Beginning sucks.
Every start is a change.
It is painful.
There will be fear.
There will be doubt.
People will try to talk you out of it.
This is all a natural part of starting something new. It is back to square zero.
Rule #3: Enjoy the start and be happy with the first baby steps, like lacing up the shoes and going for a slightly faster than usual walk, when your goal is running a marathon.
Have a plan
There is a distance between the vision, the goal, and the starting point.
Think about Warren Buffett. Who wouldn't want to have his net worth?
Who doesn't want to be rich, famous and wealthy? Admired by the world, enjoying the fruits of their labor with a lavish luxury lifestyle, cheered by the masses?
People want the outcome.
The thing is, the process of producing the desired outcome has two significant downsides:
- It takes a lot of time to achieve it. In Buffett's case, seven-plus decades
- Success is the result of the daily repetition of very few habits. In Warren Buffett's case, Reading 500 pages of company newsflow daily.
Tell me. To become a billionaire, do you have the nerve to read 500 pages daily for seven decades and make 5 to 10 investments annually?
New Year's resolutions are not different.
The first problem is the resolution must have an appropriate size achievable in 12 months.
Acquiring 300 billion from a net worth of zero hasn't been accomplished by anybody. The richest man on the planet is Elon Musk, who has a net worth of about 250 billion.
It took three and a half decades to acquire it.
Just saying on New Year's Eve in the New Year, I want to become as rich as Elon Musk is bound to fail. Too big for 12 months.
Once the sizing problem is solved and the yearly goal is well formed, like saving 10% of the monthly income, it needs a roadmap broken down into 12 achievable steps.
Rule #4: Make a plan. Talk with people who achieved the goal already, coaches, and advisors, and take their advice to tailor your 12-step road map to your specific situation.
Expect Failure, Resistance, and Obstacles
My grandmother always liked to respond when I was complaining about a hard task that was standing between me and my dreams:
"It is good. If it was easy, everybody would do it. "
And when anybody can do it anytime without preparation, it would have no value.
Think about the many Metoo businesses working hard on something thousands of other companies already do.
It is a race to the bottom. The products and services have no value unless a company defines its unique value proposition so clearly that it creates its own market.
Like Joe Rogan and Lex Fridman in Podcasting. Their unique style creates a show with its own market, not competing with any other podcast.
But it took them more than a decade of hard work.
Expect that it will be a hard exercise. Think about the Marathons. The body most likely could do it anytime. Mind and emotions can't. They need training.
First, people need to work through the first kilometer. Then, the second. Then, the third. Eventually, they will reach 10 kilometers. What was unbelievably hard a few weeks ago becomes the daily norm.
A marathon is still 42.195 kilometers — more than 32 missing.
Your monkey mind doesn't want to change. It doesn't want hardship. It will start fucking with your willpower and motivation.
It will talk you into procrastination. Don't lace up your shoes. The couch is warm and cozy. Why run anyway? It won't pay the bills. Watch Netflix instead. At least it is easy.
Expect the same resistance from other people and their minds. They don't like it when people change. They have put you in their specific boxes. Once you start working on your annual goal, you will change.
They will feel frightened by your change. You will be their mirror that shows them their inability to change anything in their own lives.
"You are too heavy for running marathons. Overweight people like you shouldn't do it. You are too old. Nobody in our family has ever achieved wealth. It is not for us. You are too dumb to study medicine."
Be prepared for a lot of internal and external criticism trying to talk you out of your plan.
Rule #5: Ignore the Naysayers.
Whenever you set a goal, get advice, make a plan, and start working on it, expect a hard, difficult, and long journey full of setbacks and failure.
"The master has failed more times than the beginner has tried."
Embrace failure; it is the sign that points towards success. The more hardship you experience, the more progress you are making. Even when it doesn't feel like progress.
This hardship, this series of failures and tears, will make your victory taste sweet.
Looking back on a hard, lonely road taken from the summit of success of not smoking for 365 days for over 14 years, memories from 17 completed ultramarathons and marathons, master degrees at university, and many more big and small goals make you feel proud and confident.
Fight for your goals; fight for your vision. You deserve success. It is your birthright.
Happy New Year!
🎙️ Chris from Beginner's Mind Show, guiding you through goal-setting and achieving success. Join me as we delve into practical strategies for New Year's resolutions, embracing the journey from vision to victory.
Discover how to turn your aspirations into achievements in our latest exploration. 🌟🎯